Sleeping With The Enemy

Posted February 3, 2010

At first glance you’d have to assume Dale Lamb is a superb and skilled carpenter, what with all the nails being hit on the head in his latest contribution – seeking truth in database theory.

Okay, that was lame but still… He is so right on so many levels, I’ll skip the bullshit and go straight to the poignant quotes that make a poor, tired and obviously less eloquent DBA want to curl up into a ball and gently weep myself to sleep.

“…the question that perplexes me is, how do I create a corporate culture that accepts there are reasons behind these rules, and that they aren’t merely the reflection of a couple of crazy people trying to push their crazy little mindsets on the rest of the crazy world around them?”

I don’t think even this (sorry Dale) can approach describing what it feels like to be us. But, it’s the closest I’ve ever seen.

This next tidbit is so amazingly accurate and rings so true in my daily struggles that I have been unable to come up with anything better than duh. I tried. For several minutes. Really.

“You wouldn’t ask a developer to rebuild the company’s Active Directory infrastructure, and you wouldn’t ask them to piece together a SAN from leftover wires and 555 timer circuits in the unlit broom closet. You have Infrastructure people for that. So, why ask a developer to make a stored procedure, or design a table structure? Are you really surprised when it doesn’t work out well?”

Seriously. He’s not making this shit up. We deal with this constantly. No offense to the folks thrust into that role. I know you didn’t want to be. I know you wished it had never happened. I don’t want to do someone else’s job. I certainly don’t want to do it not knowing how to do it right.

So, corporate leadership, stop making people do jobs they’re not there to do. Wow, that was easy. Glad we got that fixed. Haha, I slay me. Unfortunately, corporate culture does not always lend itself to making the right decision at the right time. Which brings me to the last point and speaks directly to you, corporate leadership:

“You have a fiduciary responsibility, if you are in a senior leadership role, to reveal these risks and encourage corrective action.”

Yes, the right man or the woman for the job is usually more expensive upfront than the manpower you already have. Instead of just getting by, though, why not do it right? It makes sense building or repairing your home, it makes sense for databases. Just ask Mike Holmes.